Embracing The Past, Present and Future By: Trisha A. Mays-Cummings
-Part 2
Interview By: Lukysha Sims-Neal
What's your
first memory?
My first memory is of me sitting on the front steps
of my maternal grandparent’s house with my grandfather, Gus Hatchett. I remember I had on a green and yellow dress,
and he was peeling an apple for me to eat.
I was about three years old.
Who's the
oldest relative you remember (and what do you remember about him or her)?
The oldest relative I remember was my
maternal great grandmother, Nona Skipper Wright. She was born in 1892. She died four months before her 100th
birthday in 1992. I don’t really
remember ever talking to her when we went to visit. The kids always had to go out and play while
the adults talked in the house. So I
have memories of visiting her in the county but none of being with her or
talking to her. I also remember my Aunt
Macie. She was my maternal grandfather,
Gus Hatchett’s younger sister. She was
born in 1907. I remember we would go to
Brinkley, Arkansas and visit her, and she would always have tea cakes made and
ready for us to eat when we got there.
She would sit between my sister and I on the couch and hold our hands,
which always scarred me because she had really bad arthritis in her hands and
her fingers were crooked. I remember she
had lots of pictures of the family framed on the wall and on the tables. I would always look at them, but I never
asked who was in the pictures.
Tell me about
your childhood home.
From the age of 5-12 I lived 609 Elm St in Newport,
Arkansas. I remember sharing a room with
my sister. I remember there was only one
TV in the house in the living room. It
was a white house with a chain link fence and a screened in porch. I remember playing outside in the front yard,
but I never went to the back yard. This
is the home that I discovered during my genealogy research, two years ago, was
owned by my great grandmother, Charlotte Denson, when she moved to Newport from
Alabama in 1910. When I was 12 we moved
to Diaz, three miles from Newport. This
is the home I spent my junior high and high school days in. This was the home that I had my 16th
birthday party in. This was the home
that I came to after I graduated from high school. This is the home I spent my summers in during
my college years. This is the home where
Phillip and I went to change clothes after our wedding. This is the home I still return to when I’m
visiting my father. This is the home
that hold most of my memories.
How did your
family celebrate holidays when you were a child?
When I was young, holidays (Christmas, Easter, and
Thanksgiving) were always celebrated with my father, mother, brother, sister,
my grandparents, and my father’s brother.
We never did anything big and usually didn’t have guests. Our relatives would always visit during the
summer months, so holidays were always just our family: my parents, my
siblings, my father’s brother, my grandmothers, and myself. My grandmothers would always start cooking
the day before. And my father would
always start smoking the ham the night before.
We typically always have the same dishes for all holidays, turkey, ham,
dressing, macaroni and cheese, greens, sweet potatoes, black eye peas, rolls,
pecan pie, and sweet potato pie. After my grandmothers passed away we all
started pitching in and made one or two dishes.
Tell me about
some of your favorite songs (also books, movies and television shows).
I have a very eclectic taste in music. If you look at my IPod, you will see artists
from N.W.A. to Shania Twain. Music was
always going in your house when I was growing up. My dad would listen to Motown on Saturday
mornings while he was preparing the food for his BBQ. He also would listen to the Blues. Music was like food in our house, it was
always there in the background. But if I
had to choose, my favorite type of music is 90s R&B, artists like New
Edition, XScape, TLC, Aaliyah, and Mary J Blige. As for books, I will read just about anything,
but I love books about black history and biographies. But Alex Haley’s Roots
holds a special place for me as well as the Bible. When my Granny’s Alzheimer’s was getting
advanced, and I was with her sometimes the only way to calm her down would be
to read the Bible to her. I can watch
the same TV shows over and over again. I
love the Golden Girls, What’s Happening, the Cosby Show, The Jefferson’s, or
just about any TV show from the 70s, 80s, or 90s. I also love cooking shows or any type of show
about food. I watch Food Paradise and
Diners Drive Ins and Dives looking for restaurants to try when we travel or are
on vacations.
Tell me about
some of the places where you've been happiest.
I’m at my happiest in the kitchen. I love to cook, and chopping vegetables is
relaxing to me, except onions. Most of
my earliest memories with my grandparents are being with them in the kitchen,
either helping them cook, just watching and being with them. Growing up there was always someone in the
kitchen and food always being prepared.
My grandmothers were wonderful cooks known all over town for their
cooking and baking skills. My father is
a wonderful cook as well. He did most of
the cooking in our house. I remember
helping my Granny (my father’s mother) make icing for her marble cakes. I remember helping my Madea (my mother’s
mother) boil shrimp and letting me try if for the first time. I remember putting cut potatoes in cold water
with my Paw Paw (my mother’s father) to soak before he made French fries or
fried potatoes. Feeding people makes me
happy, I get that from my grandmothers.
How many
siblings did you have? What were their names and how old were they?
I ’m the youngest of three children. My brother, Russell Mays, is the oldest. He is 44.
My sister, Paedra Mays, is the middle child, and she is 41.
Who were your
friends when you were growing up?
Growing up in a small town, my friends were
children of my parent’s friends and grandchildren of my grandmothers’ friends. My best friends were my cousin, Justin Wesley
Brown, Leigh Oliver, and DJ Coburn. We
were all the same age, and our parents had grown up together and went to school
together too. And our grandmothers were
all close friends as well. The four of
us went to elementary, junior high, and high school together. Justin, Leigh and I went to college
together. When I go through old pictures
these three are always there. If you saw
one of us, the others were right there or somewhere close by.
Who were the
close friends of the family?
My
parents and grandparents knew and were close to almost everyone in
Newport. Through my research I have
discovered that my father is the 4th generation born in and lived in
Newport. My mother is the 5th
generation born in and lived in Newport.
So my family has deep and strong roots in Newport. Growing up I was always somebody’s something,
Mrs. Mays’ granddaughter, Russell’s little sister, Wayman’s youngest daughter,
or Ernestine’s baby. So there wasn’t
just one family that we were close to or didn’t know well.
Describe the
personalities of your family members.
My family
is quiet in nature when we are around other people, all of us but my Mom. She’s the social butterfly in the family. My father, my siblings, and I are more
introverted. Although we are introverted
and quiet we all have very strong personalities. We are very protective of each other. We have good hearts and are very giving and
will do all we can for people. But we do
all have tempers. We all are pretty much
easy going, laid back, and go with the flow kind of people. It takes some of us longer to get upset than
others, but when we do the wrath is real and lasting.
Are there any
physical characteristics that run in your family?
Looking through old photos of my siblings and me
with our cousins, we seem to blend in with whoever we are with at the time. I think my sister looks like our father, I
look like our mother, and my brother is a good mix of our mother and father. But I will say that I have what I like to call
the Wright nose. That’s my maternal
grandmother’s, Ernestine Wright Hatchett, side of the family. I remember when I had my first ultrasound
when I was pregnant, the technician thought Wesley’s face wasn’t developing
correctly and called the doctor in. Of
course the lights are out when it was being done, the doctor came in and looked
at the ultrasound and said no that’s just the shape of his nose, he turned the
lights on and he looked at my nose and said see look at the mom’s nose. This baby is going to have a nose just like
his mom's. And that is the only physical
characteristic he has from me, well that and my hair. I have a picture of me, my mom, and Wesley,
and we all have the same nose.
Were there any
memorable traditions that your family practiced?
After my
older brother was born in 1972, my mother’s mother bought him a pair of pajamas
for him to wear on Christmas Eve. That
became our tradition growing up, we always knew we were getting pajamas on
Christmas Eve. My sister and mine always
matched. My mother continued the tradition after my grandmother passed. This tradition
has continued through the years as our family has gotten bigger with marriages
and grandchildren, everyone gets a pair of pajamas. That’s how you know you are really a part of
the Mays family when you get red pajamas on Christmas Eve. Although my husband and I have created new
traditions for our family over the years, we have included the tradition of
getting red pajamas on Christmas Eve.
And my sister and mine still have to match.
Can you
remember any stories that were told to you as a child (fictional, folklore, or
real life)?
I come
from a family of educators. My
grandmother, Gladys Denson Mays, taught school for 50 years. She had a bachelor’s degree and a Master’s degree
in education. Now this was in the 1930s
and 1940s, during a time when women especial black women were not being
educated through high school let alone college.
My father and both of his siblings have degrees in education. They all went to the same college, Philander
Smith College in Little Rock, Arkansas.
My mother went to the University of Arkansas, Fayetteville in the 1970s
during a time when there were very few black people attending the school or
living in the city. And my maternal
grandmother, Ernestine Wright Hatchett, went to Shorter College in the
1940s. So higher education has always
been important in my family, and I heard stories from their college days
starting at an early age. My family didn’t
talk about their lives or the lives of past generations much, but they always
talked about education with us.
Graduating from high school was an expected consequence of life, but by
no means the end of our education. My
brother, sister and I were taught at an early age that we would go to college.
What events
stand out in the memory of your childhood (historical, personal, familial,
storms or disasters, fire, etc.
The most
stand out event of my childhood I would have to say would be the summers in
Newport. The summers were always the
best because family members that had moved away always came to visit during the
summer. Both my mother’s family and my
father’s family would come to town. That
was usually the only time we would get to see and spend time with our cousins
too. It was during these months that I
had an extended family. It wasn’t just
the five of us, my grandmothers, and my uncle.
We had aunts, uncles, cousins, and close friends visiting throughout the
summer months. There were always people
sitting around in the kitchen, on the front porch, or games being played in the
yard.
What haven't we talked about that you'd
like to discuss in the time we have left? (This is a good way to begin wrapping
up the interview.)
There This is a good time in the world of genealogy and family history. There are several genealogy type shows on TV,
Finding Your Roots and Genealogy Roadshow on PBS, Who Do You Think You Are on
TLC, the Underground on WGN, and the Reimagined version of Alex Haley’s Roots.
These types of shows start conversations within families and can inspire a new
generation of family historians to start researching their family ancestry. These types of shows make people and families bring out those
old family photo albums, family recipes, and family heirlooms. They get people excited about their family, where they are
from, who they are, and stories that can be told. These are
the conversations that will be memories for a new generation.
